So. I go to the court in July 2013 in NC to file for full custody. No one there tells me that the paperwork I am filing is erroneous. Apparently, even though I have lived in NC for two years, Massachusetts still has jurisdiction over the case. I don’t find this out for several more months.
In September 2013, I hear from an attorney representing my girlie’s father. He can’t pay child support, or contact his child, but he CAN find a local attorney, and come up with a retainer.
The attorney lets me know that his client will start paying his current child support, but that he will not pay the several thousand in back support, because I claimed my child on my tax return. The child who lived with me all 12 months of the previous year, who at this point, has not seen her father in 15 months.
A court date is set for November, at which the lawyer takes me into a side room to pressure me into giving in to all of his client’s demands. “put the child into therapy, relinquish the back child support, etc” He also informs me that NC does not even have jurisdiction over this case, and that papers will need to be filed in order for them to rule on it. I refuse to agree to his terms and he informs me that he has been an attorney in this court-house for 17 years, and he will get what his clients wants. I had no idea at the time how prophetic that statement would be.
We go in front of the judge ( whom I find out later is a golfing buddy of the attorney) who tells me the paperwork I filed is wrong, and that I’d “best get yourself an attorney”. When I ask the judge what paperwork I do need to file, he tells me he can’t give me legal advice. Get a lawyer. When I tell him I cannot afford one, as I have not received any child support, he tells me that is not his problem. So, I start desperately searching for any attorney that will not require several thousand dollars as a retainer. There is no legal aid for civil court cases like this is NC.
During all of this, I am trying to help my child cope with a father who is absent. Who went “poof” out of her life, for no reason whatsoever. I will be forever thankful to family, friends, and a very special third grade teacher, who helped my child realize that her father disappearing was not her fault.
A friend recommends an attorney who can’t help, but refers me to one who says she can. Sadly, although she did not cost much, I got what I paid for. We paid dearly.
We write up an agreement. It includes “reunification therapy” for my daughter and her father. I have to transport my child to the sessions. Dad still does not have to pay the back support, as it is a “separate issue”.
We head to court in December of 2013 to have the judge sign the order. New judge. She comes into the court room, and starts opening Christmas gifts from the attorneys in the court room while she is on the bench. She then proceeds to sit with her head on one hand popping candy into her mouth through the entire proceeding. When I mention to my attorney how unprofessional that is, she tells me that is not unusual here.
So, Now I take my child to this “therapist”. I use the word loosely, because I would later find out she was not a therapist at all. She was a Certified Nurse Specialist with NO background in Family Reunification, nor in Child Psychology.
We get to her office, which is in a garage apartment. No one is there. We are standing around waiting. Finally, a transvestite walks through with a vacuum cleaner, and says “she’ll be done soon”.
My child’s eyes bug out of her head.
I speak with this woman for about 5 minutes. She tells me she will talk to my daughter tonight, then start Skype sessions with her father. I am stunned, and tell her so.
She informs me that this is how she always does it.
My daughter comes out of the session and we leave. She immediately tells me she is uncomfortable there, and does not like the therapist.
I contact my attorney. She reaches out to the opposing counsel, to offer the names of 2 other certified family reunification therapists. He says his client has already paid this one, and will not budge. My attorney tells me I can’t afford what it will cost to fight them….and again…money becomes the biggest factor in this case…..
moonandback2015 